So, you’ve been asked to be a bridesmaid, and of course you’re thrilled… but then the doubts begin to creep in:
- How much will this cost?
- Do I really have time for this?
- Is my best friend going to turn into a bridezilla?
Your role as bridesmaid has the potential to either bring you and your friend closer together or tear you apart.
The sad fact is, some “bridezillas” take the term, “bridesmaid” a little too literally. Unless you’ve opted-in to play bridesmaid for a future queen, don’t feel obligated to wait on your bride hand and foot. Of course, you want to do everything you can to make her day perfect. What friend wouldn’t? But at the same time, you have to save your own sanity.
A recent Your Tango article shares bridesmaid advice from the stars of the new movie, Bridesmaids.
The best advice, in my opinion, came from Wendi McClendon-Covey who plays bridesmaid Rita. McClendon-Covey says, “Before you say yes, state your boundaries and say this is what I’m willing to do and willing to spend.”
Before you give your friend a definite yes, ask her to have an honest conversation about her expectations. How much does she expect you to spend on your bridesmaid dress? If it’s more than you can afford, you have a responsibility to let her know up front. Don’t wait until the dress fitting to tell the bride she’s asking too much.
And, it’s not just the dress. The expense of acting as bridesmaid might include the cost of the bridal shower, bachelorette party, and a plethora of other activities. Ask your bride up front what she expects from her various wedding festivities, as well as who is expected to contribute and how much.
Advice for the bride
Take care of your bridesmaids. You’ve chosen these special ladies to stand up next to you on one of the biggest days of your life for a reason: because these are the most special ladies in your life. These life-long friendships are not worth losing over the cost of an ugly bridesmaid dress.
Check it out
- Are you a bridezilla? Take the quiz!
- Advice for Bridesmaids – What is Expected from Wedding Attendants
- Bridesmaids’ Advice for Brides: Today’s Diva Dish